june 21. 2011

I don’t understand why privacy is like an unspoken thing in this house! All I ask is that I can be in my room…writting this blog, making art, just being by myself. Is that too hard to ask? Or just the fact of..Hey, someone’s in the bathroom so don’t go in. or even Hey, you’re using the bathroom…CLOSE THE DOOR! Honestly! I don’t think it’s such a hard thing to ask for a little bit of privacy! My mom comes yelling up the stairs, knocking on the door… but then doesn’t come in, doesn’t say a word to me….Really…then was all that even necessary? I think not! So I have been cleaning my room and moving a few things around. I just wish my parents would understand that clothing is a way to express myself as is my room. How I decorate, at all things like that… See I no longer want this red bunk bed that was my brothers, So today it’s getting taken down and I am keeping the twin mattress so I have something to sleep on. Although I would LOVE to have a new bed and frame and everything. Financially that’s not possible. I understand that. Also it’s not like I have to be treated like a kid for everything. It’s ridiculous. Like today.. I understand if you’re just trying to be safe, but I’m 15 years of age, I know I need to buckle up when I’m in a car. Well, my mother thinks she needs to ask if I am buckled up.  I just feel I shouldn’t be treated the way I am when I am more mature than him and deserve more responsibility and respect. I have had to grow up a lot. No one will ever understand how I feel and what things I have had to go through. NO ONE! All I know is God had to send his son to die for all our sins. That in my book is the worst thing ever. So yes I know God knows my pain, but I don’t always think about it. I just don’t understand why all of this isn’t getting any better…